I really don't know where to begin with this post. I am beyond surprised at how emotional I am feeling about tomorrow.
Tomorrow, I will see a pediatric cardiologist to do a scan on my Sweet Pea. This is the first opportunity we have had to get a good look at our baby's development and health.
I am afraid of ruining my witness, but I have to be real. I am terrified. I didn't know how I would feel months ago when we scheduled the appointment, but now I do.
I know my Father's promises. I believe His plans are for my best interest. I know I will not stray from Him... but I can't honestly say that I don't tremble in fear of the extremely difficult path that may lay before me.
I have continually walked in a prayer of health and thanksgiving for Sweet Pea- it has become natural to me after raising Jude for three and a half years. And I am thankful for this baby! I think only an expectant mother who either raised a special needs child or has faced infertility could understand this special prayer of thanksgiving for anything the Lord chooses to give us.
However, I also believe that our Father wants us to expect great and extravagant things from Him... our wildest dreams. Well my wildest, most extravagant dream is to have a healthy child. It has been my most fervent prayer for nearly four years, and I refuse to stop praying now!
Tomorrow, I will see the tiny heart of my Sweet Pea, and I pray that everything is formed PERFECTLY! While I will not find out if the baby is genetically healthy or not tomorrow, I may get some clues. However, my prayers will NOT CEASE!
Please be in prayer for my family- from parents to grandparents this baby's health has an effect on our entire family. Thank you so much.
Confess your trespasses to one another, and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The effective, fervent prayer of a righteous man avails much.
James 5:16 NKJV
At His feet,