Late night reflecting...

Hi everyone...  can you believe it's almost here.  2011!  


This is going to be a HUGE year for our family:
-We have some major cleaning out and organizing to do.
-For the new baby that will be here in July.
-Jude will turn four!
-Lane and I will celebrate 5 years as husband and wife.
-And my ummm second 29th Birthday.  Okay, okay I'M TURNING THE BIG 3-0 this year.


This turning 30 thing has caused me a bit of pitiful reflecting.  You know, the kinda thoughts we have like "Where did the time go?" or "I thought that by now I would surely be..."


Yes, yes.. I shamefully admit I was having one of those moments earlier tonight while thinking about all that 2011 will hold.  Here is what was in my head:


I thought by the time I was thirty, I would be living in a four bedroom home serving my husband and 2.5 kids breakfast, giving the beautiful flowers on my porch some water, then dropping the kids off a preschool and daycare, and heading to teach the cutest kindergarten class.  My house would be full of beautiful candid photos of my family taken by me, and one special wall would hold a framed cover of my first great American novel.  In the evening, I would cook a dinner that would make Paula Deen jealous yet keep my family healthy and our neighbors would stop by to hear how our recent missionary trip to Africa went.  At night I would pray with my family and sleep in a peace than can only be found in knowing Jesus.


At first I focused on my shortcomings and became frustrated in myself and my "lack of zeal" to get the things I want accomplished.  But I started realizing that my reality at thirty will not be as far from my fantasy as I thought.  


At thirty I will be feeding my husband and 1.5 children in my 3 bedroom home.  I love to garden! I bring Jude to therapy, and preschool will start soon.  I have still been working towards my degree and if it takes me to 40 to accomplish, then oh well.  My photography is not awful and everything looks good in black and white print ;-).  Maybe with a few writing classes I can write a book about my experiences with Jude, or an encouraging book for mother's expecting or caring for a special needs child.  I actually do cook a few meals that Paula Deen would appreciate.  My wonderful neighbors are my brother and sister in law and they come over for those meals quite often (before I was pregnant).  I feel like God has given me a ministry more impacting than the one I had hoped for, but I still hope to go on a missionary trip.  And I do pray with my family throughout the day and we do have the Peace of knowing Jesus.  I don't think I could ask for much more.


Jude has had quite a year too:
He started eating much better and drinking from a cup.
He has added words to his vocabulary and uses them correctly.
He learned to sit up on his own and play more independently.
He learned to follow simple commands.
He can turn pages in a book and blow candles out.
He can get own his knees to play (the step before pulling up).
He learned to walk in a gait trainer.
He plays peek-a-boo and gives bear hugs.


Since new years bring refreshment and a time for change and improvement, I have a few simple plans of my own.


1.  I want to turn the TV off more and spend more time with Lane and Jude playing.


2.  I want to eat more dinners at the table and less in the living room.


3.  I want to transition Jude into a toddler bed.


4.  I want the family to play outside more.


5.  I want to spend less money.


6.  I want to develop a best friendship and prayer partner with a Christian sister.


7.  I want to cook more meals and eat out less.


8.  I want to start a one-year Bible reading plan and stick to it.


9.  I want to visit our grandparents more.


10. I want catch up on my scrapbooking and photo albums before the new baby doubles the photos.


As for the blog... nothing will change too much.  I do hope to be more transparent; I mean, how inspiring can I honestly be if I'm not completely honest.  So my posts will still contain pictures of your favorite redhead and our latest accomplishments, but I hope my words go beyond them to tell you what we as a family are facing, hoping, feeling, praying, and loving.  I blog to keep friends and family posted and inspired by our family's adventures, but it is also an outlet for me as the mom and wife who tries to keep it together.  I hope you will keep supporting that.


Thank you for loving and praying for us in 2010.  We pray you will continue to bless us in 2011.


Happy New Year!